I cry.

How could I despair ya Rabb?

You gives to me even when I did wrong

You kind to me even though I was deeply flawed

How could I give up in You Ya Rabb?

You never fails to hear my prayers

You heard me and sent me miracles

How could I give up in Your Mercy ya Rabb?

After all this time,

You still providing me countless of Your Rahmah

You let me see, hear, breathe ya Allah

How could I despair from this tests ya Rabb?

After all my weakness,

Your love towards me is greater and stronger than my own weakness.

Allahu Akbar.

Ya Allah, if I can't be the martyrs that fight for Islam,

If my weakness is so much that I did much wrong and

I can't be the one that every second remember You,

If I can't be the one who sacrifices most of every duniya things for Islam ...

And If I can only cry..

If I can only cry when I listen to Rasulullah s.a.w history,

If I can only cry when I heard of the Anbiya' stories,

If I can only cry when I read Your words in Quran...

I cry ya Rabb... I cry...

For the rest of my life...

If I can only cry for You Ya Rabb...

If only tears that I can give to You..

I cry. :'